Thursday, March 30, 2006
Just came out of a meeting with my boss this morning and I was so happy with the outcome. I've been working for almost 4 years in market research. But I'm a newbie in advertising so i somehow need to start again. Honestly, am not particular about titles except that you should of course be acknowledged for what you've earned. I don't mind starting over. Well, i thought I didn't. Until I felt that I was waiting too long for something to happen. I was looking for some excitement, but I can't seem to find it, or even have a glimpse of it.
I was wondering until when will i be 'newbie'. I didn't know if there were any plans for me, or what kind of advancement was in store. At first, I was patient, until I was getting restless.
Until this morning. I saw an end to an otherwise mundane existence. A change at least. I've found the excitement. I now have a goal. A next level to look forward to. Mas exciting na buhay ko... Salamat!
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
i've yet to dissect what my word clouds are all about, but i came up with two word clouds, one for each blogsite that i have.
the first one i got refers to the words that are randomly found in this particular blogsite. My word cloud for nuesummermoon is :
i have another blogsite however, which i think should be one i should already delete and forget about. it's the prelude to this nuesummermoon site. it's the original sweetsummermoongirl's site, which is now only a pastsummermoon... anyway, the theme's in that site encroaches the sadder part of my life, where my angsts and heartaches are locked in... My pastsummermoon word cloud came out like this:
what does it say?
Monday, March 20, 2006
It was amazing how these discoveries on how we were able to create our 'works of art' revealed something about ourselves. You see, as much as they admired the way i was able to 'paint' a portaits of people, like this family, using a difficult medium such as MS Paint, I've also wanted to be able to come up with abstract art as one of my works using this software.
However, as attempted to create an abstract figure, much to my dismay, I only found myself coming up with patterns much like a wallpaper or textile design. While Toni's work came effortlessly and enjoyably for her, i could not seem to make one of my own.
It's interesting how we realized what could be behind the reasons for our creating such works.
As i talked to Toni. I discovered, that she generally does not find it difficult to go with the flow and make something up wiht the things she is given with without any specific goal or objective in mind. Somehow, she eventually finds it along the way.
I've always thought of myself to be the same way. But with these works, and with the help of Toni, i realized that it's actually quite hard for me to do something or go forward if i do not have a visual of any objective in mind. What motivates me is the end objective I see for whatever it is that i do.
I don't know how Toni sees this realization about her more 'abstract' predisposition has manifested in her life. But i seem to have understood myself more with the realization about my 'profiler/realistic' tencencies.
As i work now. I somehow find, that i will find more fulfillment with doing something where i will have a concrete output that will directly affect something. An end to a process. It seems that work that involves tracking and constant updates do not fit me very well, because these are types of work where there isn't a concrete end in sight.
I've also realized that setting an objective for myself also makes it easier for me to get over and move on with things. The knowledge that there's an end to whatever pain helps.
In my life in general, I'm still finding myself quite lost with regard to what my real purpose in life is. I believe I have discerned that I am for the married life. However, as i work towards that, there is still an uneasiness about me as i am not yet seeing myself fulfilling it anytime soon.
At this point, finding him (i may have found him already) and having him here with me already will really do a lot in setting the direction of my life. The ;'what' is important, but even more important to me it seems, is the 'with whom'.