Monday, October 31, 2011

LIMBO


"I know that I will live to see the Lord's goodness in the present life. Trust in the Lord. Have Faith. Do not despair. Trust in the Lord"
- Psalm 24: 13-14

This verse is probably the perfect answer to my title, which is where I feel i am now, in limbo, emotional limbo, if there is such a thing.


Neither here nor there. But I know deep inside I know where I am, but I just can't bring my self to 'cross-over' to the other side. To venture back into the unknown. The hesitation, though is not because of the fear or uncertainty with the unknown that's in store for me, but because of the difficulty to let go of what I'll be leaving behind knowing the pain that it will cause.


I am currently confused. About why this had to happen and about what to do. I don't know if at this point I just choose to be confused because knowing the rea
l answer /explanation to this situation is just such a bitter pill to swallow.


I now constantly pray for clarity and strength. That by the time I reach the clarity that I need, that I'd immediately have the strength and courage to act on it, no matter how painful & uncertain the outcome. Because all I need to do is put my full trust in Him. Do I fully trust Him? I know I do, for myself I do. But for the one who will feel the most pain, I need to trust Him to, that He will give comfort when I can't. That He will give us both peace.

I ask that I don't know why this is happening, but maybe at the very back of my mind, a very small part of me knows why, or has known why. It's just a matter of accepting it and moving on. I know though, I can can never leave, that I can never forget. Because it will always be special to me. I will always care. I will always love, maybe not in the same way, but I will.



I pray for peace. I pray for clarity. I pray for strength. I pray for courage. I pray for emotional stability. I pray for all to work out for God's purpose and greater glory.